"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
This is the mantra I will be using as I re-join the HBO Young Storytellers group this fall. Our first session is today, and I'm feeling a bit apprehensive. Let me start from the beginning.
HBO sponsors two separate mentoring program. The first, in conjunction with Youth Mentoring Connection (
website here), pairs HBO employees with "at-risk" teenagers for the duration of a school year. The only stipulation in order for the young adults to participate is that they must be enrolled in school (be it high school, community college, a 4-year program, etc.). The idea is to help them find confidence and enable them to break free from things preventing them from success.
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| This photo, from the YMC blog, is of my coworker Joanna with her mentee Markeshia |
The second program, Young Storytellers (
website here), pairs HBO employees with 10 5th-graders from Westminster Elementary School in Venice. Over the course of 7 weeks the kids learn how to develop a story and write a screenplay. The scripts are then performed by actors at The Big Show which is attended by their classmates and family.
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| Photo from the YSF website |
So far, in my tenure at HBO, I have tried both programs a total of 3 times (4, including this fall). Unfortunately, for a number of different reasons, the experiences thus far have been more negative than positive for me, which makes me really sad. I've worked with kids essentially since I was a kid myself - I baby sat, I was a camp counselor, my work-study in college was at an after-school program at a Boston public school - and have generally found doing all these things to be fun and immensely rewarding.
In the case of the YMC program my mentee was just SO incredibly painfully, horribly shy* that I just never felt like I truly connected with her even after a full school year of sessions. I did speak to the program leader about it, and she reassured me that even though I couldn't see the changes in my mentee, they were, in fact, happening. So I gave it another chance the second year and willed myself to be patient. Unfortunately my mentee (the same girl) had a more complicated school schedule the second year, and after just a few sessions she basically just stopped coming. Because I was already feeling so disheartened I decided it was time to move on. (P.S. Nobody ever recites the second half of that W. C. Fields quote: "Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it." That's kind of how I felt about the program at that time.)
*There would be sessions during which we'd go around the room and everyone would be asked say
something in front of the group. EVERYONE would do it, even if
they just jumped up and mumbled something really quickly, but when her turn would come around she
would shake her head, stare at the floor, grip onto her chair for dear
life, and simply refuse to open her mouth.
When I decided to try the Young Storytellers program, I was a little weary but hopeful nonetheless. These kids were a lot younger, the program had a specific end goal, and it was only for one semester (as opposed to a whole school year). I was paired with an adorably sweet girl...
with the worst case of ADD I have seen in 15+ years of working with kids. She could not stay focused on anything. I would ask her a question about her story; she would begin to respond and would interrupt herself to ask me a question about where I got my bracelet. She also missed at least 1 if not 2 sessions late in the program - which was hugely problematic as we only had one more week before the script we were supposed to be writing was to be preformed. I just didn't have the skill/authority/assertiveness/strong enough bond with her to keep her on track. The program leader had to step in and basically stand over her as we scrambled to finish.
In both programs it might simply have been a case of being paired with the wrong person. Putting an
extremely shy person with another somewhat shy person* doesn't necessarily work well. And conversely putting an
extremely all-over-the-place person with a somewhat shy person doesn't necessarily work well either.
*Yes, believe it or not I am inherently quite shy around new people. When I switched to public school in 9th grade I discovered it was something I could overcome if I worked hard at it (and it was soooo worth it to try my best to do so), so I have been, ALL THE TIME, ever since.
SO. I am giving Young Storytellers one more shot, but of course, a part of me can't help but feeling just a little bit anxious. I have already spoken to the new leaders of our group (one of whom happens to be Boyfriend), and have asked that they help me by paying close attention to the personalities of the kids. I just need to NOT be paired with an extreme personality-type. The good news is I'm also feeling pretty optimistic and a little more confident - I know what I'm getting myself into and I know the leaders have my back. Fingers crossed this will be a fantastic and rewarding semester!
If you or someone you know would like to get involved with Youth Mentoring Connection or Young Storytellers, please click the links above for more information.
