Here are some things that would be awesome:
1. If the Cleveland airport had people movers.
2. If United had acquired Continental's efficiency in the merger.
3. If I could run more than 20 feet.
I almost missed my flight this morning. Almost. I did make it, but not without having a mild asthma attack first (I'm really not exaggerating when I say I can't run. Especially after resuming my hate-hate relationship with seasonal allergies in Cleveland after a 6 year hiatus). And also not without being told by the check-in attendant that she "couldn't promise" whether my bag would make it on the plane. HOORAY.
One of the reasons I used to love flying Continental is that both in CLE and LAX they were so efficient and low-stress. I knew exactly what to expect and how much time to allot. Since the "merger" (to me it seems that United has just taken over) I've experienced significantly higher levels of frustration and anxiety -- resulting from lonnnnnng lines -- resulting from under-staffing or incompetent-staffing. When I was waiting to check in on Wednesday night in LA there were at least 6 - 8 open kiosks at one point, but the attendants were holding us in line. I finally asked one if they were broken or something and he gave me an, "Oh. Yeah you guys can go ahead and step up to those if you want." <INSERT GIANT OBNOXIOUS EYE-ROLL HERE>
Cleveland Hopkins International could also benefit from an upgrade. As I was leisurely strolling through the Denver airport during my layover with my small coffee and Egg McMuffin, no meat, I noticed the people-movers running down the length of the terminal (two in each direction!). Oh how helpful that would've been earlier in the day when I was gasping for air and tasting blood in the back of my throat running past TWENTY-ONE GATES, half of which were unoccupied (it was before 6 am).
Anyway, once on the plane it took me at least half an hour/45 minutes for my breathing to truly go back to normal, and a little part of me was anxious all morning about whether the bag would make it. But it did. So all's well that ends well, right?
Lesbihonest though here for a second, the real reason behind my troubles this morning was that I didn't give myself enough time. We left the house at 4:30 am, but I forgot something and we had to turn around. I walked up to the check-in line at something like 5:08 am. In the old, pre-merger days this would have been a comfortable amount of time for a 6 am flight but alas, I should've known better. And to be really, REALLY honest, this was probably the 4th or 5th time I've found myself in this exact predicament over the years. The worst was after a wedding in NYC when I grossly underestimated how long it would take to get to LaGuardia and the cluster I would find when I got there. I was one of those people asking everyone in the security line if I could cut in front of them (thankfully they all obliged, probably because I seemed to panicked). I ran so hard through the terminal that the pedometer I was wearing broke off and I didn't even notice. But I did end up making it, just as I did today.
What is the moral of this story? I think it's that I need to get my shit together because one day my luck will run out. After that experience at LaGuardia I've really tried not to let it get that close again, but I totally slipped today. So, new resolution: always, no matter what, leave enough time to get to the airport and deal with crazy lines. And convince CLE to get people movers.
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